May 08, 2013

Hitman: Absolution Areas of Concern

You better get out of the way or you're gonna get hit, man!

WARNING: This review contains mature subject matter. May be unsuitable for children under the age of 17. PARENTAL GUIDANCE ADVISED.

Reviewed By: Kyle van Rensburg.

Release Date: November 2012.

Platforms: Xbox 360, Playstation 3, PC.

Developer: IO Interactive.


Agent 47 is forced to assassinate his old handler, Diana, but after realising that the truth about her betrayal is far deeper than what meets the eye, he goes rogue.

His goal: To find a girl named Victoria, and prevent the Agency from turning her into him, a cold-blooded assassin. Up against incredible odds, Agent 47 has to resort to extreme methods in order to protect Victoria.

Will Agent 47 save the day? Will Victoria live out her life as a normal person, or become an assassin? Do we even care about the story in this game?

Areas of Concern:


Mild Moderate Heavy Very Heavy Extreme Ban-worthy

General Violence:

Being a Hitman game, people can get killed in a variety of ways:

--They can be shot: When this happens, blood sprays, staining the environment, bloody spots appear on the bodies, and the enemy cries out in pain. You can also shoot enemies in slow-motion, with the camera zooming in fast and squishing noises being heard.

--They can be strangled/garotted, we see them flailing around whilst gurgling, and have their necks broken, with a crack being heard.

--They can be stabbed, or you can kill them by flinging a knife/ax into their heads, with blood spraying.

You can also hit enemies with a baseball bat or blunt object, blood spraying, killing them instantly.

--You can blow up objects, and/or set enemies on fire: They flail around, screaming in pain and eventually collapse dead.

--You can dispose of enemies by dropping them into a wood chipper; we see lots of bloody chunks and sauces and fluids stream out of a pipe.

--You can pour poison into food, and when an enemy eats it, they start choking and fall over, dead.

--When you are shot/injured, blood splatters on the screen. When killed, your character simply falls over. 

Storyline Violence: 

--A man slits a woman's throat: We only see her shocked facial expression afterwards, the actual slitting is done off-screen. 

--In one sequence, pigs are released into a minefield to test the mines: We see blood and chunks fly as they are blown up, and see the bloody carcass of one pig lying on a table.

--Your character engages in a wrestling match with a giant man; a lot of punching and kicking is shown, he punches the man in the crotch, kicks him through the face, and we see spurts of blood as they fight.

Your character pins the man to the ground and twists the man's elbow, eventually breaking it with a crack being heard as he screams in pain. You then jump on him, and snap his neck. He collapses, dead.

--A man steps on a wounded man's leg to interrogate him, and he screams in pain. 

--There are a few sequences where explosions go off and wreckage is shown flying, with lots of destruction being depicted.


Mild Moderate Heavy Very Heavy Extreme Ban-worthy

--One level features the "Vixen Club", a strip joint. We see women dancing around poles in their underwear with pasties over their nipples. The level features a whole bunch of suggestive posters with women in various states of undress.

--A man is tied up to a wall, a woman hits him with a stick, and he stares at her cleavage as he answers a call. The entire set-up of the scene makes it clear that he was engaging in a sadomasochistic act.

--A woman strips down to her underwear with the camera lingering, in order to seduce a man.

--As a man is dying, he says: "I got wood man! Why do I have wood?" (Wood being a slang for erection. Yep....)

--We see two dogs busy "mating", with movements and everything. This is slightly obscured, though.

--One group of enemies are called "The Saints", women in suggestive nun outfits which show a lot of skin.

--We see a woman in the shower, a full view from behind but slightly blurred. We also see her breast, but with no detail. This scene is not sexual at all.


Mild Moderate Heavy Very Heavy Extreme Ban-worthy

Frequent Strong Language: Uses of F**k, S**t, D**k, P**sy, T*ts, C**ks**ker, Sl*t, B**ch, A*s, B**ls, P**s, H**l, and D**n.

--God and Jesus' names are used in vain.

Spiritual Content: 

Mild Moderate Heavy Very Heavy Extreme Ban-worthy

--We see a bunch of Catholic symbols and the like.

--A woman dressed as a nun remarks "Go with God motherf***er!" before blowing a building up with a man inside of it.

--A man is mentioned to have publicly declared he was Jesus when drunk. 

--The following symbols are shown:

-Five point star. (Pentagram)

-Crucifix/Cross. (Symbol of death.)

-Dragons. (False gods, symbolic of Satan.)

-"Peace" symbol. (Witch's foot.) 

-The Fish. (Sexual symbol. Yep.) 

-Skulls. (Death.)


Mild Moderate Heavy Very Heavy Extreme Ban-worthy 

--We see quite a few people drinking and one scene takes place in a bar. We also see a few people smoking.

--We see an apartment with a bunch of "Stoners" in it, and lots of marijuana plants decorate the rooms. One of the stoners tries to flush some of the weed down the toilet. 

-There are also some drug references, like a stoner talking about "rolling a fattie", and other mild references.

Gross Stuff/Off-Colour Humour:

Mild Moderate Heavy Very Heavy Extreme Ban-worthy 

--A mention of prostate cancer. 

--A man jokes that a man must have been "waving that thing" all day, with a suggestive gesture. 

--A man is heard peeing in his pants as he cries out for help.


Abysmal Bad So-so Okay Good Very Good

Not really as bad as you may think, even though Agent 47 unquestionably murders several people during the course of the game. He only kills murderers and criminals, and the game penalises you for killing civilians.

So whilst it's bad, the morality could have been a lot worse.

Thoughts & Impressions:

Well, let me just say this straight: This game's story was abysmal. I just couldn't care about what was happening. The Hitman series never really had a strong story, but this game makes them all look like perfect yarns in comparison.
As for the visual quality, eh......The game's engine obviously did not hold up that well, and the developers tried to draw attention from it by adding a lot of "bloom" effects, which look cheesy and distracting.
The characters in this game are all "unique", but forgettable. I don't think the developers quite grasp the idea of compelling characters. They probably thought that the more random and weird they were, the more memorable.
But the end result is just distracting and annoying. This game falls far short in this department.  
So, even in the event that you can look past all the content in this game, the quality isn't that good anyways. Rather skip this game, get yourself Splinter Cell: Chaos Theory if you're so inclined.  

Look, would playing this game be a sin? Well, if you're one of those guys who won't be affected by the suggestive content at all, go for it. (Even though the game isn't really that good.)

But the Bible also states that we should set no wicked thing before our eyes, and does this game fit into that category? 

I think that the answer to that is yes. The game features sexual objectification, even though it strangely depicts the "good" guys to be the exact opposite. Victoria is virginal, Agent 47 is asexual, and Diana's shower scene is not really fanservice-y at all. (well, at least not for me.)

But the strip club sequence, and the treatment of women during the game, contradicts all of this. Only Victoria and Diana are not objectified, but the rest of the women are.

If you ask me, a bunch of scantily clad women put on display for people's lustful pleasure, is already wicked and evil.

I won't say that you are lusting if you're not, but this game kinda does go against your morals. So, it's best if you avoid it.    



For Suggestive Content, and Bad Morality


Okay, so I got a lot of older games to review, and I recently did receive some requests. I don't know which game I'll do first, but stay tuned. Reviews are coming.

Until next week, God bless. :)

Your turn: What do you think about the content in this game?

Writer Bio:

Kyle van Rensburg is the Editor-in-Chief of Kyle's Christian Video Game Reviews. (KGR) He likes cookies.

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